A Medtronic Pain Management Resource

Did You Know

Chronic pain affects not only the person with chronic pain, but also the caregivers and family members of the person with chronic pain. As a caregiver or a family member, it is important for you to understand that you are not alone.

Understanding Each Other’s Situation

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As a caregiver or family member, it is important to realize that you may never truly understand what it is like to have chronic pain. As a person with chronic pain, it is important to understand that you may never truly understand what it is like to live with a person with chronic pain. However, it is important to attempt to understand what each side may be feeling and experiencing. Below is an overview of what the person with chronic pain and the caregivers/family members must cope with when life is controlled by pain:

Person with Chronic Pain:

  • Pain that does not show
  • Fluctuating activity levels
  • Isolation
  • Unpredictable mood swings
  • Lack of interest
  • Doubt about the reality of the pain
  • Loss of job, friends and productivity

Caregivers and Family Members:

  • Inability to see or feel the pain
  • Increased responsibility for maintaining the home and income
  • Emotional outbursts of the person with pain
  • Loss of personal support system
  • Added daily stress
  • Loss of plans and hopes for the future

It is important for each side to realize the problems that the other side is coping with and that the person with chronic pain, caregivers and family members suffer. Although each chronic pain situation is unique, each person must play a role in resolving the situations caused by chronic pain.

Taking Action

Caregivers and family members also need peer support. Talking with others faced with similar life situations who understand the circumstances of living with a person in chronic pain can greatly reduce the feeling of isolation. The activities below can help caregivers and family members resolve their loss and turn their energies to productive use.

  • Get involved in a peer support group. A peer support group can help a caregiver or family member discover how others are coping with similar losses. Having someone to talk with about feelings can have a dramatic positive effect on your life.
  • Communicate with the person with chronic pain. Share your feelings. Caregivers and family members often make assumptions based on what they believe to be true. Unless they ask how the person with chronic pain feels, they will never know. You might be surprised by the insights of your loved one with chronic pain as you begin to share your feelings.
  • Identify your loss. Form a clear picture of exactly what you have lost by listing all the ways the person in chronic pain has had a direct effect on your daily life. Put your losses in order of importance. This will make it easier for you to understand and determine your priorities.
  • Make a realistic plan to change the situation. Identify those things that are within your power to change and work towards changing them.

Reprinted from the American Chronic Pain Association (ACPA) Family Manual with permission from the ACPA. Please visit www.theacpa.org for further information.